News Columns
These columns on parenting skills appear in the Taos News.
An Alternative to "Discipline"
July 2016
Fathers' Advice Matters!
June 2016
Helping your child make proper introductions
May 2016
Family Job Descriptions
April 2016
Helpful Family Communications
March 2016
Is Your Child's Glass Half Full?
January 2016
The Miraculous I
December 2015
Modeling Good Manners
November 2015
Your Naturally Spiritual Child
September 2015
Parent, or Coach?
August 2015
One model that can help you be effective as a parent is one that comes from coaching. This model enables you to guide your child to her highest potential and to help her reach the goals that are important to her.
Fathers Are Important 365 Days A Year
July 2015
How important are fathers, really? What are his contributions to his children? How do they benefit from his care?
Does Your Child Bully?
May 2015
Children bully others for a variety of reasons. What should you do if your child bullies other children? How do you talk to him about his behaviors and motivate him to change?
Dealing With Teasing
April 2015
Many behaviors get classified as bullying which are actually teasing. Learn how to distinguish one from the other, and how to help your child get along better with others, along with effective techniques to use when they are teased.
Parents, Love Your Children
March 2015
Most mothers and fathers love their children. At the same time, many parents transform their children in ordinary beings by putting the stamp of conformity on them rather than encouraging what is unique in their child.
Helping Your Child With Conflict
December 2014
Conflict is a major stress in children’s lives. If you teach them a few simple guidelines for handling conflict, it will enable them to get along better with others, and to reduce their stress.
Family Dinners Are Important!
November 2014
How often do you eat together as a family? All the things you worry about as a parent could be improved just by sitting down to regular dinners! Having a family meal together even once a week can make a world of difference.
The Value of a Family Mission Statement
October 2014
Creating a family mission statement will give you and your family a clear and compelling vision of what you and your family are all about. Creating one is fun and interesting and it will help you all to stay on track through the turbulence of life. You will be able to point to it and say “This is what our family is all about.”
The Value of Being Personal With Your Child
September 2014
When you respond to your child by being bossy, or by acting phony, you contribute to his becoming a defensive person. It is crucial allow your child to love the authentic you. Once you put your mind to the task, it is not that difficult.
Understanding Your Child's Developmental Stages
August 2014
As children grow, they must master different developmental stages. Certain experiences are necessary at each stage which you, as the parent, can provide. By doing so, you will give your child a foundation for negotiating many of life’s challenges.
Accepting Your Child's Uniqueness
July 2014
By being able to identify your child’s unique strengths and weaknesses you are in better position to strengthen his capacities for trust, intimacy, resilience, perseverance, and coping. Each child is very different in his or her degree of mastery of various capacities. By looking for important individual differences you can best help your child to cope and thrive.
Fathers Count!
June 2014
Approximately 33% of children today live in homes without fathers. Their absence creates many problems for their children. Learn why fathers count.
Mothers And Their Children
May 2014
Having and raising a healthy child is the ultimate fulfillment for most women. However, sometimes we pretend the mother-child bond is wonderful when it is not. By acknowledging and working through the fundamental ambivalence involved in being a mother, you can have a profoundly positive impact on your child.
Your Child's Need For Nurturing Relationships
April 2014
Consistent nurturing relationships are a necessity for the health of your child. From them they learn to be empathetic and moral. There is no substitute.
The Most Delicate Subject
March 2014
Disturbances in sexual functioning affect every aspect of a person's life. Therefore it is important for parents to focus on the healthy sexual development of their child and how to achieve it. Ways to go about this important task are discussed.
The Value of an Extended Family
February 2014
It could be of value to know that contact by your child with empathic, sensitive adults outside your home could be of value to him - and to you.
Talking With Children About Death
January 2014
Many people think children are not aware of death, but research shows starting at age two, children express feelings and ideas related to it. How to recognize when a child is experiencing anxiety about death and how to talk with him/her about it is presented.
Dimensions of the Ideal Family
December 2013
A child of any age benefits from living in congenial harmony with family members who communicate honestly and openly and who provide genuine experiences that enhance the child's search for happiness and meaning in life. An ideal family provides many advantages to all of its members. All of us can and should apply ourselves to making the family we are in as ideal as possible.
Ways Parents Damage Their Children
November 2013
Unintentional abuses, psychological and occasionally physical, inflicted by generally well-meaning parents during childhood cause children to form powerful maladaptive defenses that preclude the possibility for a rich, fulfilling life. Some of the ways parents affect their children adversely are presented.
Be Compassionate, Be Real, Be Vulnerable
October 2013
Are you the adult you want your child to grow up to be? What you are teaches the child more than what you say, so you must be the person you want your child to become. To do this, the parent must be vulnerable and love and accept who she herself is.
Teaching the Law Effectively and Lovingly
September 2013
Laying down the law with our children can be difficult. Without the guidelines of meaningful limits where “no” means “no,” a child cannot grow up with a correct respect for authority. “Don’t do to others what you wouldn’t like done to you,” can serve as a useful guideline.
A Philosophy of Parenting: Love, Law and Work
August 2013
French philosopher, Luc Ferry, suggests we are most likely to succeed in bringing up our children well if we include three important elements: love, law and work. Children who are brought up with these three elements in mind are able to start school in a fit state to learn what they are taught. If you keep these three things in mind you will go a long ways in ensuring your child’s success.
Positive Youth Development
July 2013
Researchers from the field of "Positive Youth Development" have shown that most young people do not have a stormy adolescence. The majority of teen-agers exhibit four universal strengths: competence, confidence, connection, and character. We can promote positive development in our youth using these findings.
Encouraging Your Child’s Multiple Intelligences
June 2013
Because of their popularity, we are inclined to think there are only two kinds of intelligences: verbal and mathematical. There are actually seven major kinds of intelligences that have been identified by scientists. Find out what they are and how to support them in your children.
Foundations of well-being for you and your family
May 2013
How psychological well-being is thought about today is much more sophisticated than when we were growing up. Being current with this knowledge will enable parents to direct their interactions with their family in a healthy manner, enabling everyone to flourish.
Fostering Emolional Growth in Your Children
April 2013
Emotional growth is not a steady upward curve for adults or children. However, if we help our children develop a vocabulary of feelings, reflect their emotions back to them, and help them to be responsible for their emotions, we will be most likely to emotional growth.
Understanding Your Child's Emotions
March 2013
Emotions are an important part of every interaction we have with our children and can serve as a positive energizing force. Since every child will experience the full range of pleasant and unpleasant emotions, we need to help them understand and be comfortable with all of their feelings, not just the ones that are comfortable for us.
Mindful Parenting Under Difficult Circumstances
February 2013
The reactions you have to your child in difficult situations can happen within a matter of seconds and can damage your relationship for a lifetime. When you practice mindfulness, those same situations become opportunities to grow instead. This will allow you to focus on the positive aspects of your relationship with your child.
Mindful parenting
January 2013
Have you ever asked yourself how to make the atmosphere in your home life calm and nurturing? Do you make it a point to be consciously aware of your responses to your child in the current moment? Find out how to do so.
The Gift of Failure
December 2012
None of us wants to raise fragile, entitled or fearful children. Helping your child to grow through failure will be a big help in not doing so. Learn how to manage uncomfortable feelings around failure to help your child promote his sense of self-confidence as he moves forward in life.
Parenting that Facilitates Healthy Child Development
November 2012
What are the qualities needed to be a good parent? What are the basic skills one needs to have in order to help their child develop holistically? The ideas from Dr. Eugene M DeRobertis, author of "The Whole Child," are discussed.
Protecting Your Children from Today’s Problems
October 2012
Research into the question of "what are the elements in a young person's environment and person that enable them to thrive?" The identified elements are presented along with encouragement to establish and create those elements within one's self, one's family, and one's community.
Learning to Listen to Your Child
September 2012
We all know the healing power of being listened to. Yet, as parents, we often talk at our children instead. A few listening skills are given.
Patience
August 2012
Patience is a character strength required of all of us throughout life. Those who have developed their patience are healthier and happier than those who don't. Ways to develop your patience and the patience of your family members are included.
How Full Is Your Bucket?
July 2012
We all have an imaginary bucket inside. When it is full, we feel happy and on top of the world. When it is empty, we are bereft. Find out how to keep yours and other peoples' buckets full.
The Healing Power of Humor
June 2012
Humor is an important coping tool that can relieve stressful times in our lives. We may not solve our problems with humor, but while we are laughing, we might find a way out. Ways to increase humor in your daily life are introduced.
Encouragement vs Praise
May 2012
Though they might on the surface appear to be the same thing, they have very different effects. Praise can foster dependence, while encouragement alllows a child to become self-directed and responsible. Learn ways to become more encouraging.
Forgiveness:
An Important Skill for Families
April 2012
Schoolwork - How to support your child's learning
March 2012
How to Build a Great Relationship with your Child
February 2012
Parenting Styles: Relating to your child
January 12, 2012
Teaching Children How To Solve Their Own Problems
December 2011
Understanding Why Children Misbehave
October 2011
The Importance of Family Meetings
September 2011
The Art of Setting Limits
August 2011